Sunday, August 28, 2005

overhaul

on loop: sayang ~ stonefree

i've decided to change some things about my life, to let go of some people whom i feel could never be the missing pieces of the puzzle i've been trying to put together. it won't be easy and i know that i might regress, but in time all good things must really come to an end. but alongside it, other good things will also begin. i'm sure of that. such a waste, and a pity as well, but we must move on and explore other horizons. for that is the way to not get stuck in the past, burdened down by broken dreams and abandoned hopes. in reality, life is like a box of chocolates... JOKE! hehe corny na nung analogy na iyon, i have no plans of using it (i don't even like chocolates ;p). kasama na sa overhauling ko iyong pagiging hindi na masyado corny and ma-drama. last na 'to (i can't promise, though hehe ;p). but for sure, i can promise that i will set my priorities straight and first things first. it would be good to let go of all the emotional baggage that simply weigh you down, and keep ahold of those that inspire you and strenghten you.

actually for me, life is like a boat ride. you start out from the shore, sometimes by yourself or sometimes with other people. but the bottomline is, you are in charge of the steering wheel. at times, you find yourself being tossed by the waves or caught in a storm, but at times, you are awed by the vastness of the ocean around you and the clarity of the water beneath you. there will be moments when all that is around you is water, with no land in sight. you may feel alone, but you know that you never are and never will be. peril will always be just around the next wave or so, and you must be ready at all times. during the trip, you may have the need to let go of one of your passengers to ensure the safety of the others, or usually, of yourself. but if you're lucky, you will realize that you got the right people on board and the right gear and equipment to get you across. when you reach your destination, you'd look back and see the path you trod littered with uncertainty, and you will smile because you are proud that despite all the obstacles, you simply rode the waves and never jumped ship :)

achuchuchu

on loop: cool ~ gwen stefani

ateneo won over UE yesterday! what a game :) i haven't been able to watch that many ateneo games this season and when i saw how they played yesterday, wow they've really gone a long way. gulat ako, japeth aguilar and martin (?) quimson were totally dominating the boards. usually, LA tenorio or JC intal were the expected top scorers, but the rest of the team have been consistent in their performance these past few games. so far, ateneo is still aprt of the final four. at the beggining of the season, many had bleak hopes of that, pero galing. whatta turnaround :)

i really wasn't supposed to be able to watch the game since i had some school stuff to attend to, plus had to go to my blockmate's house again for our presentation. but halfway through the afternoon, i really felt sick right after we came back from divisoria (for some materials we needed for the exhibit we were putting up... punta kayo! hehe, on sept.16), and i asked to be dropped off in gateway, so i could get a ride home from there. andun pala game ng ateneo, and sakto mga atapos pa lang ng first quarter. i even contemplated on watching the game pero sad naman nun, mag-isa lang ako. magtetext sana ako ng makakasama, but i didn't have load so i just decided i should go home.

papuntang sakayan, i saw a friend who was a former player for ue. turns out, he had to watch the games often because he was being invited to be part of the coaching staff (uyy sisikat na siya... joke! hehe ;p) he was telling me how good the game was getting and i was so tempted to watch, may courtside tickets pa naman siya! pero catch is, ue side. ngerks, ayoko pala hehe :) not because i have anything against their team pero shyempre diba, plus na-guily naman ako to ditch my blockmates to watch the game (baka daanan pa ng camera mukha ko, mabuking pako hehe) so i ended up going back to my blockmate's house to work on our project and watch the game na rin. o 'di ba, atleast balanced ;) rewarded myself for the long hard week by going out. got home way way late, good thing 'di ako pinagalitan. nakalusot nanaman hehe.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

nanaman

on loop: my name is lucas ~ susanne vega

may nangyari nanaman :( na nakakalungkot talaga. wala na nga sigurong pag-asa yon. madaling sabihin at mahirap gawin, pero sa ngayon alam ng lahat kung ano dapat mangyari. sana kayanin ko, but i always fall into the same stupid rut EVERY single time. sa bawat pagkakataon na nakakabawi at umaayos, parang sampung pagkakataon naman ang kakabig dito. tama na nga siguro yung sinasabi nila, 'wag na pilitin kung ayaw na talaga... :(

*****

eto, on a lighter note. yesterday, i received one of the lousiest and cheesiest pick-up lines ever.

"nagpapacute ka ba?....

wala lang, effective kasi eh."

ahahaha. o 'di ba, panalo?! parang maaawa ka na lang kaya pagbibigyan mo na lang eh. hehe joke lang :) kaniya-kaniyang effort lang 'yan.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

hapi dey

on loop: let's stay together ~ big mountain (super lss)

today's a good day... no hang-ups. happy day :) despite the crappy weather, and the fact that i slipped in front of 7-11 katipunan, and that i lost some money, everything's a-ok. i could really feel that i am blessed with so many things in my life, and i am just so incredibly thankful.

*****

it's finally here! the bvlgari parfum i redeemed from the dell dhs contest zone arrived already. smells so good, though it's a bit woodsy. i was hoping for something citrusy or fruity, i guess. actually, it smells like it's for a guy since it's kinda musky and stuff but my dad said it's for a girl... so i trust him since he knows his perfumes and colognes.

*****

i am officially on the dean's list already :) too bad i'm an irregular, or else i would have qualified for the scholarship. i think i'm actually starting to like miriam. hehe just kidding :) anyway, speaking of school, we watched "abakada ina" this morning in class. it's this film starring lorna tolentino as a no-read, no-write probinsyana. really liked it, one of the best tagalog films i've ever seen together with "ganito kami noon, paano kayo ngayon?". thank you Lord for all the blessings.

Monday, August 22, 2005

sloth

on loop: oh ~ dmb

i've been so lazy this entire weekend! (yes, my weekends include mondays ;p) i have not accomplished anything whatsoever. my only attempt at getting something done was to go to my blockmate's house to work on our project but we got so frustrated with it that we decided to bum around instead and didn't really get to do much. darn. actually, i wasn't too much of a bum this long weekend... i did some reading. i re-read some john grisham books i have and got started on the HP book 6 my blockmate sent me thru mail. i have never read a single page of any harry potter book prior to that so i didn't exactly ease into the whole setting. in short, 'di ko na gets ahehehe. hanggang movies pa lang kasi eh.

it's raining really hard right now just when i was planning to go to gateway and get coffee or something plus some stuff i need from national. bummer. ayun, i'm stuck here. i need to get started on stuff i've been putting off for the longest time. i was supposed to blog about something sensible but i forgot what it was about... tsk. i've become more senile these past few months, malala na 'to hehe. i mentioned this to my dad and he said something off-hand like, "nakita ko sa chart sa hospital, too much alchohol and nicotine daw nagdudulot ng memory loss". pa-simpleng hirit pa eheh. my dad knows the shy*t i intoxicate myself with, and somehow he doesn't get on my case about it. he just let goes of some colored remarks like that from time to time as a simple reminder.

one time, he explained to me that he grants me so much freedom because he knows i'm responsible in my own way. pa-guilty effect pa ata hehe. anyway, i'm rambling already since i forgot what i was really supposed to post about... classes nanaman tom, kakatamad na ah, to think back to square one nanaman ako haha. oh yeah, naalala ko na yung isang thing na dapat iboblog ko! i've been meaning to mention this here and i'm not so sure i have, but here goes: larry fonacier has been drafted into the pba! this is stale news but cool nonetheless. i'll finally get to see him play again :) he got into red bull barako, which is cool since he'll be with rico villanueva as well, and also paolo bugia who was drafted into the team with him. hope he's fully recovered from his injury and that he'll do great! hehe :) o sya sya, alis muna ako, maski ako nabobore sa sarili ko eh hehe. ciao

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

onga pala

on loop: love song (cure cover) - 311

this morning while eating breakfast, ganito naging dialogue namin ng dad ko:

dad: 21 ka na diba?
me: ha?! ngeh hindi pa no! kayo talaga, pinapatanda niyo ko!
dad: ahh.. (laughter) sorry ha. malapit na rin naman eh di ba? so, anong plano mo? you've got to start thinking of what you want to do.
me: tagal pa po! excited kayo masyado. august pa lang eh...
dad: in denial ka na naman (tawa nanaman). 2 weeks na lang 21 ka na! ok lang yan, you look like you're 20 lang! (lalo pa nagtatatawa)
me: hay nako ewan. kelangan ko na po umalis, late na ko.

anyway, my point is... tanda ko na pala. hahaha. but mind you, i don't feel so old. as a matter of fact, i feel younger than most 18 year-olds (feeling!). but no one can really deny the fact that together with time come changes that are inescapable. most of my peers are already graduating after this school year. i was supposed to graduate with them but i lost track of the bigger picture and nagpadala ako sa mga kalokohan kaya ayun, got sidetracked (understatement of the year).

nalungkot tuloy ako. everyone tells me its allright, and i suppose it is but then again, i have never felt so strongly that i want to turn back time. kahit 1 year lang. but we all know that's not possible. the only thing i could probably gain from this experience is a lesson learned... may not remedy the situation much but hopefully, could avoid more mishaps in the future. hay nako, nagmumuni-muni nanaman ako. ayoko na nga, kung ano-ano naiisip ko eh hehe. basta, i never want to grow old (hahaha). nothing worse than losing one's youthful zest and outlook in life.

speaking of my birthday, i honestly did not realize that it was approaching so soon already. i don't have any plans for it, and come to think of it, i don't think i'd want to celebrate it that much anyway. i've always celebrated all of my past birthdays and i don't think it would make much of a difference if i missed out this year. a little get together of my current friends would be nice but nothing too all-out and prepared for. i vow to spend most of september 3 at home with my dad... haven't done that in a long time :)

*****

yay... walang pasok sa friday! 4-day weekend :)

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

express

on loop: fix you ~ coldplay

the weekend went by so fast. parang kaka-friday pa lang, biglang monday na agad. express weekend. it totally slipped my mind that i had a load of stuff to do... ang nasa isip ko is may paper lang ako for theology and an 8-minute speech for filipino regarding women empowerment. i forgot that i'm having a major exam on wednesday which weighs 20% of my final grade, and a paper that's supposed to serve as my midterms din. bad trip.

*****

bea's celebration was fun. good food, good drinks, great people. it was just too bad that quite a number of people that bea expected to come wasn't able to. turns out, she didn't follow-up her invitations and stuff. she texted just a few people and asked them to invite the others. well...

but it was fun all the same. we just wish she could have enjoyed it more :)

ended up sleeping over, then they came with me to school the next day for a play i needed to watch. sunshine wanted to drop by sta. lucia after the play to get some toys and baby stuff, i think but bea had a migraine and i ended up driving to and fro. poor bea felt so sick we had to stop over. good thing she felt better when she got home.

*****

i also wrote this sort of entry/essay about a number of things i have never really been able to discuss. probably because i was too chicken to do so, or that i never really knew how to put the thoughts into words (i think i still don't), or it could be that it wasn't time yet to do so. one of these days, i'll put it up in here. i wasn't comfortable posting it since, in my opinion, it reveals too much. but i realized that it's the only way i would ever be able to express whatever it is that i have to say, so i might as well. it's not finished yet... in fact, i haven't even started. but i have a somewhat vivid idea what i want to say because i have never seen things as clearly as i do now and i have never come to a realization as complete as that of what i had this weekend.

in due time, all things will come to those who wait.

*****

and to you, our very special friend slash caffeine-addict:

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

you rock :) keep it coming.

Friday, August 12, 2005

ten de ren den den...!

on loop: hand in my pocket (acoustic) ~ alanis morisette

i'll be breaking my hiatus for now... but just because i would like to greet a really good friend a very happy birthday in advance Ü i'm excited for you! a LOT of people love you and you're very special... yo could only get so much better in time Ü always keep safe and keep close to God. enjoy!

*****

on a side note, i also have great news (for myself hehe). Dell Computers (dubbed as the world's largest computer company ;p naks) will be opening their very own contact center in manila (RCBC plaza, makati) by feb of next year and they'll start hiring agents by the end of this month. i loved my stint at Dell, and as i've heard so many times, there's no place like Dell ;p so obviously, i know where i'm headed hehe. i'm really excited at the prospect of getting to work for fun again, and at the same time earn for stuff i want out of banality hehehe. i can't wait!

*****

the weather's really weird nowadays. sunny and hot one minute then all damp and rainy the next. really messes up everyones bodies (for some reason, i'm always hungry! rarr... kain ng kain tuloy :D)... and my skirt as well. hehe. by the way, i aced (as in, perfected) my midterm exams for english and humanities! yeah, dean's list here i come. haha hopefully (since i bombed my math exam blah blah what else is new?) Ü

*****

just a few special people are invited for the dinner, but a lot are invited for the event after! cool :) masaya 'to hehe. ten de ren den den... ;p

*****

so there. i'll be slinking back to my self-imposed hiatus, before i start getting melodramatic and o.a. again ;p and before i go, my new number's up hehe. sorry i couldn't text everyone 'coz i don't have your numbers still. please text me at 0922-3252**8 Ü the first missing digit is my birth day and the second missing digit is my favorite number, so if i had your number and you can read this, i'm guessing you know these. hehe thanks :p keep safe everyone!

Sunday, August 07, 2005

better

on loop: i wonder ~ diffuser

after the really rotten week i had last week, i'm actually feeling better hehe. good for me :) now all i need is a phone and a sim.

last friday night, i got home a bit past 2 already and woke up with a slight fever. had to go to school yesterday morning and i didn't tell my dad i was sick 'coz he wouldn't let me out that night if he knew hehe. biogesic, decolgen and dolfenal works ;p tulog lang kailangan hehe.

anyway, got home around 3 already last night. we made our own bailey's... panalo! and chicken cordon bleu din... winner rin. practice makes perfect hehe.

bea's birthday is fast approaching... we're excited por yu ;p

i'm also going to receive a bottle of perfume from my job before... it's part of the rewards Dell computers offer to their agents (DHS Contest Zone). it's a Bvlgari Eau Parfumee Au The Blanc ;p fancy name no? sana mabango hehe.

thanks to everyone who gave me their numbers via YM and email. will text you as soon as i have a new number :)

also, advanced happy birthday, mel (liszy in ateneo ;p)! wish you the best and may you kick a*s in france! goodluck and keep safe on your trip... i'm proud of you.
2 more midterms to go: an exam for math and a baby thesis for socio. plus a couple more major papers for the others.

by the way, i'll be going on a short and temporary hiatus from blogging. i'm guessing that the next week or two is gonna be an imowshonal rollercoaster for me so i don't want to vent here, it's too public and people who aren't supoosed to read it, just might. so bye for now :) have a happy rainy august!

Saturday, August 06, 2005

whatta week

on loop: amber ~ 311

grabe 'tong week na 'to. puro kamalasan... ang panget. gives a whole new meaning to hell week :( on top of the ton of school work i had to get through, ang dami pang kung ano-anong nangyari na nakakalungkot talaga :( it wouldn't be any problem if it were just school work, 'lang kaso yun 'no. but i just couldn't take everything else, sabay-sabay pa :( really messed me up, 'till now. i'm just hoping and believing in His plan for us... that everything happens for a reason. like what my mom always used to say and pray, He does not give us anything we won't be able to handle.

edit: by the way, my 09224309094 number is not active anymore. lost it (again! long story), please sned me your numbers either thru YM or here. thanks.