melancholic

melancholic

on loop: follow you down ~ gin blossoms

sigh. i'm feeling so emo today. i think it's near that time of the month again. rarr. i feel so 'down-in-dumps-pitiful-bored-pathetic'... that kinda thing. anyway. i feel like i'm a walking sigh. hahaha. it's that bad. and the fact that i've been holed up at home all day doesn't help any thing. i was actually supposed to go out today and apply over at ambergris in discovery, ortigas since some of the people from work are badgering me to go with them. but i was too lazy to move so i ended up pegging off. i promised to file my application tomorrow after work. i'm seriously thinking of moving to another company, preferably etelecare in eastwood. only ambergris, sytel and etelecare are offering the same Dell account that i'm in right now, and their starting pay for those with experience in the same account is off the charts. i don't want to name any figures right now since i haven't heard it from the companies themselves, but reliable sources have confirmed it to be so. who wouldn't want more money, right?

i don't want to be so materialistic but if i want to be productive and maximize efficiency and skills, i should move out. but as always, the only thing that's kinda holding me back is my being too attached and sentimental. i've grown to really like the people i work with and TP's starting to feel like home. it would be hard to leave it if ever. another reason why i feel like i should keep moving companies until i get to go back to school is because i'm afraid that i might have a harder time leaving TP if i stay longer. more relationships would be built and more stronger bonds would be forged, and at risk of sounding too cheesy, i'd rather give that up than give other things up for it's sake. so there. aside from that, nothing much has been happening. well yeah, a lot of small things have been going on here and there but it's too soon for me to pay any attention to it. wouldn't want to jinx anything or appear too OA, so it's best that i clam up first until i'm positive.

fast shallow facts: i wanna go shopping. as in, real big-time shopping. plus, i want a car. hahaha. dream on. but i hope it'll be soon. i also want to transfer schools already. i love ateneo and all (i really do), but i think i would have to transfer to another school. i don't know why, but i just might have to. hopefully, i'll get into la salle and continue with legal management or probably take up accounting and make my dad happy (since he's always wanted me to be a cpa lawyer). and call me silly, but i don't want to go back to school yet this june. i mean, i wanna study already and finish school, but i don't think i'm ready just yet. i'm not lazy or begging off from school, but i guess i'm just beginning to spend some time for myself minus the detachment academics bring. i'm learning more about myself and it's helping me a lot. i may not want to be back in school just yet, but i know that i'll have to be. i mean, i might as well get it over with.

anyway, i should get back to being all emo again. i'm rattling off nonsense already. plus, i still have to order from mcdonalds... no one's home, ergo no one to make me dinner. since i'm too lazy to even fry an egg, i'm turning to the next best thing: have a burger delivered. dun-de-dum.